Chris von Keyserling Goes National

RTM member, Chris von Keyserling, on his way to full membership in the Tod Akin Club!

RTM member, Chris von Keyserling, on his way to full membership in the Tod Akin Club!

I knew this story had, shall we say, legs, when the details started to “evolve”. First it was a pinch on the buttocks, then it became “the groin area”, and finally, the media has settled on “genitals”. And the perpetrator, Chris von Keyserling, was quickly promoted!

His actual position as one of 225 members of Greenwich’s Representative Town Meeting, was determined to be not good enough for the media’s purposes, so he immediately became a “Republican official’, then that was improved to a “Republican politician”, and now, in addition to the last two, he’s risen to “Chair of the RTM”. Isn’t it amazing how, with a little media help, his career is improving!

Oh, and the incident occurred at our local old folks home (Nathaniel Witherell Center), but that was deemed an odd, possibly harmful detail, so now it’s become “an unnamed Town facility”.

Why all this trouble to “groom” the story? Why is it about to get the full NATIONAL MEDIA treatment? Because, unfortunately for the eccentric, often amusing Mr.von Keyserling, he has voluntarily provided all the ingredients of an irresistible story-line.

Whether you’re a recent graduate of the Howard Zynn School of Journalism, or a grizzled news veteran plugging away at your little New York Times cubical, you wake up each day with the identical agenda. It’s not actually written on parchment, framed, and hung on the wall of every newsroom in the country, but it doesn’t need to be, it’s understood by all…

Anything that embarrasses, disparages, or destroys Republicans will be immediately placed at the top of the news list.

Every day of their working lives, eager reporters sit and wait for something, anything that fulfills this mission. Whatever it is, whoever it is, they can use it.

And it doesn’t matter how obscure the political figure is.  Think Tod Akin, unknown Missouri US Representative, who made the idiotic remark that “legitimate rape doesn’t cause pregnancy”. Or remember that poor sap, Idaho Senator Larry Craig, caught nudging his foot against another chap’s in an airport men’s room? Or Congressman Mark Foley, discovered sending little love notes to a male intern? You wouldn’t know any of those names if they’d been Democrats, and their stories, if they were exposed at all, would never have travelled beyond the borders of their individual states. Sadly for them, they were Republicans, so they were elevated to national status.

So, sorry Chris, old chum, but that’s the world we live in. You have unfortunately become “useful” to the media machine, and you will now be used and used, until a better story comes along!







18 thoughts on “Chris von Keyserling Goes National

    • Ay-Non:
      It feels ironic to a conservative Republican, but again, all that matters to our dear friends in the press is the “R” label, they make absolutely no distinction between a liberal or conservative Repub (sadly, it is the lib Repubs that believe they can make friends with the media, but those “friends” ultimately stab ’em in the back).

  1. You are missing the point. He admittedly sexually assaulted a woman, according the the warrant. Does it matter if he assaulted her on the buttocks or genitals? That’s just lovable, playful, dotty ol’ Chris? I’m surprised you are not telling the victim to “get over it”.

    It most certainly is a new world, and women are not dealing with this sexist garbage anymore. See you at the march on Saturday.

    • Ay-nonny:
      Neither you nor I know exactly what von Keyerserling did that day. By calling it a “sexual assault”, you weaken the strength of that serious charge. They tried this crap with (former Trump campaign manager) Cory Lewandowski when he grabbed the arm of reporter Michelle Fields. We all got to watch that 15-second video 500 times, as the media tried to convince us she had been “assaulted”. Stop mis-using that word!
      (can’t make the march, but text me the photos!)

      • No, we don’t, but he does, and I’m just reading what the guy admitted to.

        He apologized to a detective for pinching the woman, according to the warrant.

        I don’t define sexual assault. The state does. It’s not misusing the word.

        Fourth-Degree Sexual Assault

        A person commits this crime when he has sexual contact with (1) someone who is under age 15, mentally incompetent, physically helpless, under age 18 and under his care or supervision, or in custody or detained in a hospital and under his authority or supervision; (2) another person without consent.

      • Ay-Non:
        The language of criminal law often elevates trivial actions with serious-sounding words. All sorts of very minor acts can be categorized as “creating a public disturbance”, for instance. Merely poking a cop with your index finger can get you charged with “assaulting an officer”. The language of the courts is inappropriate for normal discourse. And, in this case, it’s done for political reasons; a “pinch” sounds like what it is, silly and unimportant, whereas “assault” gets the reader’s attention. That’s how this little game is played.

  2. “The language of the courts is inappropriate for normal discourse.”
    Is it appropriate for the criminal charge? Sounds like you are trying to mansplain the law.

    • Ay:
      The media-machine, the one that scours the earth for Republican dirt, but is silent about endless Democrat abuses and misbehavior, will, at its discretion, introduce the “language of the courts” when it suits their purposes. Republican von Keyerling’s pinch becomes an “assault”, whereas Democrat Clinton’s buggering of a 19 year-old intern in the White House is termed, at worst, “inappropriate behavior”.

  3. It’s sad that this woman needed to make a big case about being pinched on the buttocks, and yes, Annonymous, this is to you. How about a verbal warning or a slap on the face? Running to the police when an old man pinches your ass is making yourself more of a helpless victim! You go ahead and March this Saturday, I’ll be at my kickboxing class. Let’s encourage the “weaker sex” to get strong and stop whining.

  4. You do you. Don’t condemn a woman for taking appropriate legal action. Did you know assaulting a senior citizen is a felony? We can all imagine the countersuit.

  5. Follow the money. The victim’s union representative told Bob Horton, reported in Sunday’s Greenwich Time story, the victim, a town labor union officer, may take action against the town for not reporting the incident properly.

  6. It’s amazing how that Democrat label gets you OUT of trouble too. Why in Massachusetts a Democrat can drunk drive right off a bridge, kill his mistress in the process, crawl out of the water, leave the scene of an “accident”, then disappear for 18 hours, not be arrested, AND be returned to office term after term after term. How KEWL is that?????

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