Bon Jovi: Still not dead.
AP: For the second time in less than a month, police have discovered the body of 49 year-old rocker, Jon Bon Jovi, this time outside a Laundromat, near his home in Sea Bright, New Jersey. Mr. Jovi struggled with police and EMT personnel as they attempted to load his body into a chilled container, shouting “I’m not dead yet, you idiots! Good lord, this is worse than the Richard Gere gerbil rumor!”
The Sea Bright Coroner’s Office issued this statement: “As Coroner, I must aver, I didn’t throughly examine….him.”
Note: There’s an Internet hoax going around claiming this guy died…
Greenwich Bored And Razed 